Two simple words, yet where do I even start??
I’m just 12 weeks away from being a qualified Personal Trainer; something that has been a dream of mine ever since my fitness journey first began.
Exactly when this fitness journey first began is hard to pin point, because to simplify it, I’m a girl who has struggled with weight gain her entire life. But anyone who has struggled with their weight will know and understand that this is far from simple. Difficult, challenging, exhausting, rewarding, disappointing and fulfilling… are just a few words I would use to begin to describe this journey.
I guess that is why I’m here, and why Jessie Michelle Fitness was created; as a platform to share my journey, thoughts, knowledge and experiences as they happen.
I’ve wanted to do a blog for a while now, and I promised myself that when I did, it would be 100% real, raw and represent my true authentic self.
With that being said, here’s my journey:
From a young age, I have always been noticeably more overweight than my peers and this meant that sometimes I was teased for my size. The problem was (and still is) that I absolutely love food, to the point that I ignore my full button. I’m better at this now, but as I child I couldn’t understand why I needed to stop eating when I wanted more? I wasn’t a massive fan of sport, and if there was a ribbon for last place, I would have a folder full of them. Being overweight in primary school came with its own struggles; including being singled out for my weight when our grade 4 teacher used each student’s weight as data to teach bar graphs. Why our weight was used I will never understand??
Fast forward to grade 5 and I was fed up with my weight controlling my life. I started swimming after school and on holidays, and over the next three years the weight began to fall off me; just in time for high school.
My weight issues weren’t as noticeable now; but my body image issues certainly remained, however, over the next 5 years I was more conscious of what I ate and I exercised regularly.
This takes us to 2013. I moved away from home, was accepted into college, and suddenly my priorities shifted to partying, drinking and the carb heavy buffet. There is a saying to watch out for the fresher 5 (the 5kgs you gain when you start at college). I’m a bit of an extremist, so my fresher 5 soon became an extra 15kgs of weight gain over the two years I was there.
So here I am in 2015, a 19 year old girl, unhappy with her reflection. I didn’t respect myself or my body and I was unhappy with myself because of it. I regularly binged on food and alcohol and I lacked self-control. I would write myself off on alcohol, over indulge on greasy fatty food, and then be ridden with guilt when Monday rolled around. I sought attention to raise my self-esteem and looked to others for self-acceptance. This girl lacked SO much confidence. Daily movements became a struggle and finding clothes to wear every day was not only difficult but often disheartening.
February 9th 2015. This is the day I took my first progress photo. Monday morning I laid in bed with zero energy, no drive, I felt bloated and full, my digestion was so out of whack and I was very unhappy with myself. I (literally) rolled out of bed, looked in the mirror and couldn’t believe how far I had let myself go. I knew something had to change because I couldn’t keep living this way.
Over the next two years, I tried every diet imaginable including; low carb, no dairy, no gluten, no dairy & gluten, paleo, whole 30, 5 and 2, vegetarian, vegan, macro counting, intuitive eating and intermittent fasting. I joined and cancelled three gym memberships, ran two half marathons, worked out at home, and completed an 8 week challenge with Hiit Australia.
I lost 3 dress sizes, 20 kg and a total of 87 cm from my entire body.
I look back at that day proud that I had some fight left to change the path I was on. It hasn’t been an easy process but I am now the happiest, healthiest, fittest and most confident I have ever been. I know who I am deep down and I live my life every day as my true self. I respect & nourish my body and this helps me move it daily. I workout because I love it and it keeps me sane.
We are only given one life and one body. Yes, my journey is long and certainly not linear, but it has brought me to where I am today. I’ve experienced many ups and downs and shed a lot of sweat and tears. But I have a whole new lease on life. I’m working hard to achieve my dreams, and can’t wait to share it all with you along the way.
That’s all from me now,